He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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