As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize