Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
