Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
