Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Just cropdusted the office
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
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