I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
