You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Randomize
