Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize