i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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