hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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