Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Swine flu is the new snow day.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I think your dad took our porno
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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