"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
