Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
