I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
