This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
It's blow job season.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
