dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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