he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You ate ashes out of my bong
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
