By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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