i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
