no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize