Sponge bath it is.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
