He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
