did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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