No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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