As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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