There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
