Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
