White coat. Heels.
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
