if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Randomize
