Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
