do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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