I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
