her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
