so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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