what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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