girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
