Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
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