Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i think i scared a bird with my dick
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
How does one acquire holy water?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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