Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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