She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize