I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
