he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
