My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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