I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
No subtext here. People are naked.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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