omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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