I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
