remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
