HIV tests are more positive than that guy
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Randomize
