My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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