im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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