Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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