Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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